NFL Picks: Week 6

Someone needs to tell Secretary Paulson to shut his damn mouth. After two weeks of major league level sucking, The Dow was actually doing OK today. That is, until around 3 PM when Mr. Genius Paulson gets on the TV and starts blubbering about how the economy is gonna keep sucking for a longer time than expected. The Dow instantly plunges 200 points and finished down 190 points on the day. Thanks a lot dumbass.

You're all I have left, my sweet NFL picks. Last week was ok, as I went 6-5-2, bringing my overall record to 42-24-4. Oh sweet, sweet NFL picks, you'll never plunge to a five year low on me.

As always, home team in caps, picks in bold.

Tom Cable +7.5 SEAN PAYTON

The Saints let Gus Ferrotte embarrass them. Jamarcus Russell is no Gus Ferrotte, but the Raiders can cover this spread nonetheless.

COLTS -4 Ravens

Time to really Christen the new building.

Kitties +6 JETS

Probably a shit pick, since the Bengals blew their wad last week against the Cowboys and will likely tank. But I'm really needing those shootout points from Housh and Coles. 3-3 here we come!

SKINS-13 Rams

Once again the Skins are disrespected? Only 13 points?

Fish +3 MOO COWS

Unless Sage Rosenfelds suddenly learns how to slide.

Bears -2.5 FALCONS

I can't figure if this should be a great, fun game or a boring ass slopfest. Either way the Bears should take it.

VIKES -13 Lions

Gus Ferrotte strikes again!

Jags +3.5 BRONCOS

Please God, Please. This can start to make up for the 3 fluke home wins that Denver has on their record.

Iggles -4.5 49ERS

Donovan says he's "embarrassed" by his play so far. God hath heard his lamentings and so sent him the 49ers.

Boys -5 BUZZSAW

Immobile QB + Dallas Pass Rush - Anquan Boldin + God's Own Agent on Earth + My Boy Romo + Pac Man all happy from hanging with ASU girls Saturday night = Boys win big.

BOLTS -5.5 Pats

Cause we need it bad, like a sailor home from a year at sea. The Bolts are gonna come back into their home port take care of business.

BROWNS +8 Big Blue

My head tells me no, but my gut says the Giants are in for a close one against a desperate Horse Balls trying to hold off Brady Quinn.